A Mother's Heart: Dealing with In Laws

Ah, the joys of family. The likelihood of everyone in a family getting along well with tremendous love yet without outright conflict is small, certainly these days. What about the added complication of in-laws, whether or not a couple is married? What about in blended families? What about with adopted children? Yes, absolutely, it's definitely possible and advisable for everyone involved to be authentic, loving and malleable, getting along with love. Absolutely, I recommend it. I also have to be real here and say that sometimes this lovingness in all kinds of families can take some being and doing.

Knowing that all of us come from Source, that we are Sparkling Light and Love at our core is a big help. Meditation, clearing oneself of emotional and mental clog is mandatory. Yet, we are also in our human -- hu-wo-man -- gear, and sometimes egos and personalities can clash. This is also clearly seen in astrology. When planets square, this aspect can create challenge, which translates and opens the way to opportunities for growth. Sooooo, what to do if and when clash and conflict, irritation and ire, happens with you and another person?

For myself, in various family situations now and in the past, I was doing my best to simply let words, attitudes, feelings that I sensed and picked up from others do the proverbial duck slide off my back. However, I was advised from a dear one in my Clairvoyant Crew who also comes to me -- yes, psychics also consult psychics -- to stop "taking low" and stand up for myself, nicely, lovingly and definitively, and allow others to deal with it, so everyone gets an opportunity for growth. Now, understand, when growing up, I was the one with the biggest mouth, yelling the loudest in verbal combat with my mother. (We long since made up and forgave one another for everything totally.) With plenty of self-work and seminars, therapy, what-have-you, I've mellowed considerably so I can almost always simply be my normally loving self with an open heart.

Yet, yet, yet, I can still be set off. A signal for more self work. If this can happen with me, chances are you also can be triggered. What do I suggest? If something truly is unimportant and trivial, let that something go. If the underlying principle operating in the situation is important, find an enlightened way to address the principle, the issue and the circumstance. Letting too much stuff slide, however, is like putting dirt under a rug. Even a little bit is still dirty, therefore lacking in impeccability. A mound of dirt, even and especially if seemingly hidden, is a mountain, so the result is filth, which is beyond yucky and totally a barrier to any kind of authentic relationship. If necessary, literally get an impartial facilitator -- usually best if not a member of the family who may have either a vested interest in the outcome or may be insufficiently trained or of an appropriate consciousness for this sort of intervention -- and have that person or group speak with each participant. Then have a group get-together. Come up with goals for each person and the family as a whole. Everyone truly has to acknowledge her/his part in whatever is happening. Denial leads to issues. If people refuse to own up to whatever part they're playing in this family drama, then everything is more complicated and unlikely to have the highest and best resolution. This is an excellent opportunity for breakthroughs and true family harmony, benefitting each and every person involved.

Open your heart with love. Ask Source to put wisdom in your heart, head and mouth, and come from this place. Put everything in the hands of Source when you go to sleep at night, asking for a solution in the morning. Follow the Guidance you are given. Be willing to forgive and pardon, including with yourself. Let go of the attitude or belief that someone has to be "right" or "wrong," and go for a win-win situation. So long as harmlessness or the Buddhist concept of "ahimsa" is the result, go for it.

Yes, stand up for yourself -- gently, softly, clearly and openly. If need be, agree to disagree. Allow everyone to have his/her perspective. Say, as I occasionally have forgotten to, "That's an interesting point of view," as taught by Gary Douglas, originator of Access Light Energy Work. Let go of polarity. Is this always easy for me? Not as yet, though getting moreso. So, yes, more evolution on the human scale.

If, in the case of in-laws, and there are children, if everyone involved is loving and caring with the children, this is of paramount importance. Also, find something to like and enjoy about all the people involved, and share this aspect of life with them. Meditate and prepare yourself when you know you are going to be dealing with anyone who might "trigger" you. In fact, if you do get triggered, what is there in you to trigger? This is already a signal that you have internal work to do so you are totally clear. When nothing can "get" you, you are in a clear loving space, able to deal with wherever anyone is on the spectrum of human or hu-wo-man development. You are free! This is approaching Mastery.

Yes, it's a journey. For all of us. Lots of Love and Blessings to YOU!!!!

Love,

Mama Heart
Audrye

Transformation Catalyst, Healer, Spiritual Therapist, Author, Artist, Web TV
CEO/President/Founder, GoddessHeart, LLC
CEO/Chairperson/Co-Founder, Achee, 501 (c) (3) nonprofit organization
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A Mother's Heart: Oh, The Joy of My Grand-Baby

My Baby-Grand celebrates her First Birthday this weekend. As my son-in-law said, she'll probably consider it a mammoth Play Date. My daughter and son-in-law are creating a fabulous fete for all of us and friends to celebrate this beautiful being's first spin around our sun.

How I love buying clothing and stuff for this little person. We all do.

For you and your child or children, grands or great-grands, Give Till Your Heart Smiles (TM), as I say for Achee (www.achee.org), remembering that love is the absolutely biggest gift. Make, build, create, purchase, share your heart and time with your child/ren and grands or great-grands. As ever, clear up ANY "junk" from the past so you create a present that's truly a gift for all of you. In my case, I also do this. This way, the actual love that exists between myself and whomever the other person is or group of people, can freely flow.

Is this always easy? No, yet it's simple. To refrain from doing this is sure to create clutter of emotion, mindsets, energy and the rest. Unneeded. Unnecessary. Undesired.

Back to participating in my Baby Grand's life. Now she is learning to stand. She can manage about a minute's worth on her own, then down she sits, with a mega-grin on her beautiful face. What a great spirit she has!!! I see her mom, dad, my mom, dad, and my former spouses's dad and himself in her, as well as myself. And, obviously and of course, she is totally her own person.

What brilliance will she bring to herself, us and the world?! Even though I've studied her astrological chart, participated at her birth, her beauty is unfolding with all the joys she is already radiating and will be illuminating to us all. May her journey be a glorious one!

May we all live from our hearts and souls. May we all be blessed. May we all clear ourselves and be the Light and Love we are!!!

Blessings and Love,

Mama Heart,
Audrye
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