Friday, December 28, 2012

Why Do Some Moms Bully and Push Their Kids Too Much?

     I just read about one of the "reality show" moms pushing her six-year-young daughter to practice her dancing until this child cried in utter exhaustion and overwhelm. 

    Why do some moms do this?

    This is poor mothering.  Is it the mom who wants to succeed in whatever she is shoving her child to excel at?  Usually, yes, absolutely. 

    Often the mom -- or dad -- who unceasingly and uncaringly rides her child beyond the child's capacity, is someone who lacks love for herself.  Often, this kind of mom is feeling deficient in some area.  Yes, the mom may say she wants the best for her child, that no one supported her (the mom) so she (the mom) is being supportive of her child.  This is a smokescreen for callousness.

   It is vital that we moms encourage our children.  It is imperative that we moms recognize the talents, abilities, tendencies of our children, and empower our children to realize the fruition of their gifts.  As well, as good moms, we also help our children with their challenges. 

    To work a child -- or anyone -- till that child is exhausted and spent physically and emotionally is both physical and emotional abuse. 

    Whether on a reality show or in "real" life, this is obvious.

    Yes, every person has her or his own breaking point, and mom has to be astute enough to avoid confusing true encouragement with abusive bullying.

    When mom, or the "star" of a reality show, or anyone else is the bully, we have to call it what it is.  Child abuse.  Bullying.   Disparaging a small one so the adult "looks good."  In actuality, the adult, the ostensible grown-up, actually looks pathetic, forceful, manipulative, dominating, cruel, unfeeling, and a host more.

     This differs greatly from mom or a teacher being lax, careless, lazy, overly permissive. 

     Teaching a child internal discipline so the child innately looks to excel is what's needed.  This is better accomplished by encouragement, discussion of what can be done better, accountability, love.  Seemingly torturing a child in the name of love or encouragement is a mega lie to good parenting.

     This confusion is part of what leads to emotional chaos in a person's life.  Also, deep within herself, a mom knows when she has pushed her child too much.  If the mom is unaware of this, this mom needs professional counseling. 

      All of us benefit from transformational, evolutionary, energy, psychological work.  To avoid getting this is both foolish and dangerous.

     Be a loving, encouraging, creative, enlightened mom, causing evolved kids.  Require the best your child can give.  Reward your child for every step she or he takes.  Give them challenges, some of which are within their grasp, some of which are a true reach.  Allow your child to know success and "failure," meaning not quite making the mark.  We all have to know how to deal with this.  This way the child learns that she or he can "fold," and then pick her (or him) self up and go again.

     These are vital life lessons.  Everyone benefits from learning them.  It is ongoing.

    Have a blessed New Year!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Transformation Catalyst, Author, Clairvoyant Consultant, Spiritual Therapist, Healer, Health & Wellness Coach, Enagic Kangen (R) Water Distributor, BlogTalkShow Host, Artist, and, definitely, Mom and Grammie (GET the BIG BOOK on SPECIAL till 1.1.13 on Kindle and Nook)

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Thursday, December 27, 2012

A Good Mom Knows When to Get Support

   A good mother knows when to ask for support.  This is before any crisis occurs.  Everyone has to know when she (or he) has taken on more than she can handle.  We all get signals within us, whether a feeling of dizziness, a stomachache, lack of sleep, overscheduled days, the Inner Guidance (different from the chattering internal dialog) or what-have-you.

   Good moms want the best for their children.  In the case of the Newtown, CT, tragedy, there were signals throughout this young man's life that he needed more help than his mother could give.

    Was it appropriate that the young man's brother was "supposed to" be his brother's caretaker?  Only up to a point.  All persons have to have the opportunity and possibility of living their lives, especially as a youngster.  All siblings are meant to help one another, definitely.  This is different from one sibling being responsible for another one, especially if the one needing help has a mental, physical, emotional or spiritual dysfunction.  Dysfunctionality requires expert open-hearted competent help.

    When individuals or a group are always silent, refusing to express their feelings, needs, opinions, desires or anything germane to who they are, this is generally a signal that something is askew.  Often, this lack of response signals that energy is building up, as in a pressure cooker. Without a proper means of release, this energy can -- and often may -- explode.

     Just as overly angry, aggressive, resentful, dominating, manipulative people have to learn how to better manage their emotions and deal with the underpinnings of what is truly going on within them, so, too, do people who hide everything inside without sharing anything anywhere with anyone.

     It is tragic that this young man, likely with his mom's best intentions, did not get the help he needed.

     To have him living in a household rife with guns, plus bringing him to a shooting range, was incredibly foolish.   Perhaps target shooting was his mom's way to release her own stress.  Perhaps she thought target shooting gave her some control over a tenuous challenging home situation. If these were some of her motivations, she was also acting out, rather than doing her internal work.

    Both people needed help.

    Neither got what they needed.

    This is something for all of us to look at within ourselves, our families, our lives. 

    Be sure you get the support you need.  Ask.  Ask.  Ask.  Find people who are competent to help you.  Be willing to give back.  Create a barter.  Find what you can give or share that will benefit the other person or someone else.  Life is an exchange of energy.

    Also, Rather than taking on everything possible, instead take on a moderate amount of "stuff" to do in your life.  Do what you have to do as well and completely as you can.

    The energy of the times is that of flux, transformation, evolution, where each and every one of us is called up to be responsible for our own lives, while also being supportive of one another's growth.

    Be wise in your choices. 

    Much love in the New Year!!!!



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Thursday, November 8, 2012

My "Baby" Grands - 7 Tips for a Great Family Visit

One of the greatest joys this mom has is also being a GRAMMIE to three fabulous grand-children. 

    I leave tomorrow to visit these wonderful young people.  To maintain privacy, I'll use initials only. 

       L is a four-year-young amazing active adorable little girl. 

      O is now 2, and has managed to potty-train herself by following the lead of her sister. 

      H just turned 1, and I look forward to giving him his presents in person, with a gift each of my grand-daughters.

    So, how to make a visit as pleasant as possible? 

     Here is what I intend to do, so I'll share:


      Seven Tips for a Successful Visit

1.  Center yourself daily!  Be in your inner peaceful place.  Allow this peace to emanate from you.

2.  Love yourself all the time.  In this space of love, also definitely love your family members, friends, "other" as best you can, the planet. 


3.   Remember, this is their home with their rules.  You are a visitor here.  Be sure to treat everyone with respect, and be treated by everyone with respect.


4.   Bring joy to everything.  Add JOY as a daily ingredient and create a minimum of 15 minutes of JOY daily. 



5.   Be a contribution.  Always find a way to make whatever is happening better, more enlightened, more loving, more beneficial. 



6.   Speak and Interact with Loving Wisdom in your heart, mind, body and attitude.  Whatever you have to say, remember, Love is the Highest Way to Communicate.  This has to be real.  Go back to # 1, if need be.


7,   Pray, Meditate, BREATHE, Affirm, Fill With GRATITUDE and Stay Connected to Source/Goddess/God/Essence.  Do this several times daily.   From this core, you will be Guided about what to say, when to be silent, when to give, when to receive.  If you find yourself getting distressed, then PAUSE, and inhale and exhale slowly and deeply from your diaphragm in three-part breathing.  Do this a minimum of three times. 


      I am so looking forward to seeing these energetic, blessed little beings!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

     May your life be filled with joy!!!!!!!!!!!

    On another note, yes, I am beyond grateful that President Obama continues as President.  More on that in another post.



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Sunday, November 4, 2012

Vote for President Obama! Re-elect Woman/Mom Supporter

Moms, we are on the eve of a critical election!  We have pull!!!!!!!

Vote for President Obama!  He and Vice President Joe Biden champion women - intelligent, articulate, evolving women.  Women/moms with or without money!  Women/moms of every complexion, religion, background!  President Obama is the father of GIRLS!  He is committed to his daughters - plus  yours and mine -- having a great life, with possibility and freedom.

    In terms of this Choice/Abortion issue.  No one I know loves abortion.  Abortion is a necessity so long as we have unwanted pregnancies.  Yes, we must have universal contraception that works and is safe.  Absolutely!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  We also have to have choice.

    Do you remember what women did before choice was legal?  I do!

   There were women who put hangers inside themselves to terminate an unwanted pregnancy. These women sometimes aborted, sometimes created great danger to both their fetuses and themselves.

    I am a huge champion of contraception.  Every sexually active female and male must have this, plus the knowledge, skill and wherewithal to use the birth control properly.

    I love life.  I love babies.  I loved being pregnant.  All this by conscious choice!!!!!!!!!!!

   Forced pregnancies are as reprehensible as forced abortions. 

   We all need choice, consciousness, contraception available to us without someone else sticking their business into our privacies.  Yes, we have to educate all girls, teens, women on how our bodies work, and how to prevent getting pregnant.

    The Republican candidates would scrap Planned Parenthood, make abortion illegal, take away women's rights that many of us -- I am of THAT age -- fought so hard for. 

    Do you want to be like a country with women walking several steps behind their men????  This is what Romney and his ilk want, be well aware of it.

   Vote for President Obama, and for a Democratic Congress, so we can more done this term, and really make a huge difference!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Bless us all ladies!!!!!!!



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Friday, August 24, 2012

"Rape Is Rape" Plus Five Tips to Heal From Rape

    First, all rape is reprehensible.  No rape is welcomed or wanted; this is why it's called rape.  Whether a person is beaten up, under duress with knife, gun or fists, being forced to have any kind of seeming sex act is rape.  And, yes, surprise, a woman CAN get pregnant from this heinous act.

     Despite what Rep Todd Aiken (R-MO) and his followers might say, a woman's body does not vet a sperm to see if the woman desired that sperm or chose to reject it.  If that were the case, there would be no pregnancies from rape.  As we know, instead, there are many. 

       Pleases be aware that many politicians are lying through their teeth and doing whatever else they feel they have to in order to obfuscate their true intentions and the issues in order to con people -- you!!! -- into voting for them.  There is a kind of dis-ease of the mind in some people of the Republican Party, yes, including the Tea Baggers, in their so self-righteous approach to life.  It also seems to me that irrespective of religion, all uber-Conservative religionists feel they are always right, and everyone else is clearly wrong, and that the world has to follow their narrow definition of anything.  To refrain from doing so, to them, warrants severe punishment and penalties, both from our beloved Creator and, of course, them. 

     Watch out for this!!!!  These are young souls!  Enlightened souls and beings behave very differently, giving people love and the possibility of evolution.

     Moms, women, girls, awful as it is, we have to acknowledge that there are too many people with political and social agendas calculated to bring women back over 100 years.  A quick word on abortion before I give Five Tips to Heal From Rape.   Before abortion was legalized in the U.S., women still aborted.  Rather than doing it safely, women went into the proverbial back alley and/or stuck hangers into their vaginas.  Is there any sane person who wants this for themselves, her sisters, friends, relatives, any woman?  Clearly, no.  This would be tantamount to the illegal acid-throwing that had been rampant in Pakistan.


1.  Acknowlege that you were raped.  Acknowledge this to yourself, your beloveds, your friends, your spiritual counselor, your therapist.

2.  Get support, counseling and help.  See an energy healer, talk and scream it out.  Pray and ask for spiritual support.  Do The Recapitulation, Tapping, other self-healing techniques.  (See and
 Join a support group and get professional help.

3.  Love Yourself Thoroughly.  After a woman (or man or child) has been raped, often that person wants to hide.  Yes, take a relative moment for yourself, and reach out.  Be sure throughout all this, love yourself completely.  Feelings of being dirty, unclean, violated, less-than, foolish, blame, shame, guilt, and other less-than-loving emotions are likely to cascade through the surviver-thriver.  Experience them for a moment, so you know what it is, then instantly release them.  Let them go to Light.  Whoosh!!!!!!!!  Fill yourself from Crown to Root with Golden White Sparkling Energy and let this bless and clean you thoroughtly. 

4.  Talk About Your Experience.  Share what happened.  Get it out of your system.  Write about it.  Empty yourself of it.  In writing about it, much wisdom will come to you.  Help others who were in similar situations.  If you choose, become an activist.  Take internal and external actions.  Activate your Survival-Thrival Gene.  Know how strong you are.  Yes, take actions to apprehending the perpetrator.  Be pro-active in your ongoing journey to deeper wholeness, which can be construed as holiness.

5.  Give Thanks for Your Wellness.  An attitude of gratitude that you survived, thrived, and are here to continue your life is extremely helpful.  At whatever step in this journey you find yourself, give thanks that you are here.  You live!!! Send love and gratitude to the Creator, to all parts of your body, including your physical self, as well as your emotional, mental and spiritual selves.  Appreciate a blade of grass, the rising sun, the crescent moon, everything.  Ask your inner being what you learned from this experience.  Release fear, and anything less than internal love, as you strengthen yourself in a balanced centered manner.  You will discover that you have learned much about yourself and the world.  Put this to good use.

      Ladies, yes, I was raped many years ago with a knife to my throat, and I have also in the past sometimes been in a sexual situation that I preferred to be out of.  Thankfully, I learned from all of it. 

      Rape is rape!!!!!!!!!!!  No one should have to endure it.  We have to have abortion, whether anyone personally likes it or not.  As half of American pregnancies are unintended, many of them aborted, clearly we have much work to do to have all of us maintain our rights and be responsible with our actions.

     Refrain from ever allowing to take any of this away from you. 

     Love Yourself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Mama Heart

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Friday, August 17, 2012

Are Male (Human) Contraceptives on the Horizon?

     What a boon to everyone to have this so-very-important aspect of human sexuality and intimacy be truly shared by both women and men!  Especially when a man and a woman are in a close trusting relationship, how easy to have the man take the contraceptive rather than the woman, especially if there are no side effects!

     According to the research mentioned in this article, and, yes, mice are noticeably reticent about verbally sharing their thoughts, this drug prevents sperm production yet allows full male libido and performance!  How fabulous!

      Please let me know your thoughts and feelings about this.  Comment here or on my FB page: or

      The more buzz we create, likely the more research gets done!  What's your take on this?

       Thank you and many blessings to you!!!


Mama Heart

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Wednesday, August 8, 2012

To Spank or Not to Spank? Just say NO to Spanking!

      What do you think of parents slapping their kids? Do you believe in corporeal punishment?  Do you hit your child?

      It is inappropriate to slap, spank or hit a child.  Speak to your child, explain what's needed and wanted for the child.  Stop the objectionable behavior, use positive reinforcement, and give at least 10 yes's to each one no.  Have the child know she or he is still a good person.  Spare the rod, without spoiling the child.

     When a parent, whether mom or dad, spanks her/his child, the parent teaches the child that hitting, bullying, violence is the way to do things.  The child learns to be manipulative and to have lower self-esteem, and feels demeaned, less-than.  Why is this?  The child was disrespected by the parent who is supposed to love the child.  This also teaches great confusion about what love is and what love does.

    The child may or may not stop the objectionable behavior, not because the child learned anything but because the child prefers that the slapping or nasty verbal language and tone coming from the parent be stopped.  So, if the child has to agree with the parent, the child often will do so.  Did this mean the child learned the lesson the parent meant to teach?  No.

      Have I ever hit a child? Yes. Also, afterward, I felt I was the one who made the mistake. Always.  It was a bigger lesson for me than for the child, the few times in my life that I did it, spurring me to grow spiritually.  I also apologized to the child, and explained what needed to be done.

      Where are you with this?  Where are you with "spare the rod and spoil the child"? For me, it's ridiculous. Once at a lovely event, another mom and I had a difference of opinion about this, she feeling that because the Bible ostensibly taught this, she was totally justified to smack her daughter when her daughter misbehaved.  In fact, she felt I was disparaging of her religious beliefs because I told her the Bible was written in a patriarchical age by men who often had a dominating controlling mentality.  She was in a huff.  I maintain there are better ways.

      Sparing the rod and finding more enlightened ways to teach one's child by and large brings forth a healthier child.  Yes, absolutely, discipline your child.  Be appropriately firm yet loving.  Refrain from slapping, hitting, whacking, smacking.  This means you are out of control, especially if the parent does this when the parent is angry. This is one of the reasons we still have war.

     See more on Kindle and Nook with THE MOTHER'S MANUAL, A SPIRITUAL AND PRACTICAL GUIDE TO CHILD REARING AND MOTHERHOOD.. Just put the name in.  The entire book is on Kindle at

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    Lots of Love,